Gracious reader,
Yesterday, I received an interview request forwarded to me by my publicist:
“I’m writing a piece today about civility in America following the weekend protests and the president’s AI video response. Would Ms. Hudson be available for a quick 5–10 minute interview?”
I sighed — not at the reporter, who was perfectly kind, but at the grim predictability of it all.
First came the déjà vu: another “scandal,” another moral outrage I’d have to Google just to understand what everyone was fighting about.
Sure enough, I typed “protests and president AI video” into the search bar, and immediately wished I hadn’t. If you haven’t yet, I don’t recommend you do it either.
Another performance of anger. Another round of national humiliation packaged for clicks.
For a moment, I was tempted to decline the interview. Not because I didn’t care, but because I’ve grown bored.
Bored of outrage, of the daily churn of indignation disguised as news?
Bored of a national conversation that feeds on resentment and leaves us emptier for having participated in it?
Aren’t you bored too?
Don’t answer the question you’re asked. Answer the question worth asking.
But then I realized what an opportunity this was — not to comment on the absurdity, but to change the subject entirely to something more hopeful.
So I took the interview.
And every time I was asked a question about “how terrible things have become,” I told stories instead.
I talked about Bob, the mayor of Urbandale, Iowa. Urbandale is already a remarkably civil place to live — but Bob and his neighbors want to go further. They want to become a paragon of renewal in their state and country.
I talked about Annie, a head of school in Colorado. What began as an invitation for me to deliver a commencement address has evolved into her passion for a school- and city-wide civility initiative, inspired by The Soul of Civility.
These are the stories that matter.
Not the spectacle, but the substance.
Not the noise, but the quiet work of people reclaiming their civic power and choosing to build beauty right where they are.
In the outrage economy, everyone wins but us.
Our political leaders gain power, media companies earn clicks, advertisers sell distraction. The only losers are the citizens who exhaust themselves giving attention to what they cannot change.
But the moment we withdraw that attention, we start winning again.
And when we turn it toward building something good and beautiful in our own communities, everyone wins.
Every day, people like Bob and Annie are proving that renewal doesn’t begin in Washington or on social media — it begins in living rooms, schools, and city halls.
So yes — I’m bored with outrage. You should be too.
In the end, what we give our attention to becomes what we serve. Attention is our power—our most limited and therefore most sacred resource. When we squander it on outrage, we surrender ourselves; when we offer it to what is good, beautiful, and true, we rebuild the world from the inside out.
A Civic Renaissance reader named Brad recently reminded me of a line from the French philosopher Louis Lavelle, who wrote, “Love is a pure attention to the existence of the other.” That, I think, is the heart of civility—and of any real renewal. To attend is to love; to look closely is to begin the work of healing. (Thanks, Brad, for being part of this community!)
Let’s redirect our attention toward the people and places that are making our country whole again.
It starts with you. Stop giving away your attention and your power.
Take it back, and use it to build something better.
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Share the Civility Summit recap video, tag your community, and remind people that renewal begins wherever we choose attention over outrage.
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Quotes from the article that sparked this post
“Politeness and civility are not the same,” Hudson said. “Politeness is etiquette, it’s manners, it’s technique. Civility is something deeper, richer. It’s an inner disposition of the heart. It’s a way of seeing others as our moral equals worthy of a bare minimum of respect just by virtue of our shared moral status.”
“It’s performative, spectacular, media hijacking, that’s what we see on full display,” Hudson said. “And I’m much more interested in shining attention on the people who are digging down, cultivating, building something better and more beautiful in their communities, because that’s where their power is.”
How does civility get restored in America? “We need to put politics back in its proper place,” Hudson said. “We need to recover things in our lives that are totally apolitical in nature.” Hudson added that it’s important for each individual to find it within themselves.
“[There are] people who are saying, I can’t control what the president says or does,” Hudson said. “I can’t control the tragedy happening across the world, but I can control myself. I’m going to double down and make my community better and stronger and more beautiful.”
PragerU Book Club:
Excited to share my contribution to the PragerU Book Club—discussing one of my favorite books, Pascal’s Pensées, a timeless meditation on faith, reason, and the human condition.
Currently Reading & Loving:
In his grandiose claims for Friend.com’s divine competence, Schiffmann puts his finger on something real that we have largely missed in our accounts of what is so alluring or “sticky” about these relational chatbots. If the lack of social relationships was the problem, simply forming more of those would be the solution. But loneliness is more elusive than that: We can easily experience loneliness in crowds, marriages, friendships. Loneliness paradoxically emerges not in the absence of social relationships but in the presence of social relationships that are lacking or unfulfilling in some fundamental way.
Year Ago on Civic Renaissance:
Thank you for being part of our Civic Renaissance community!
